Not that there was a question of his paternity. There will be no daytime tv moment for us.
MAURY: In the case of 3 month old Luke, Steven you ARE the father.
STEVEN: I can't afford no more child support. I already got six kids!
ME: I knew it! You his daddy, you his daddy! You gonna pay!
Don't judge me. Sometimes you just need to watch a little Maury to feel better about yourself.
Like I said, there has never been any doubt that Steven is Luke's father, but it's surprising how quickly he's started in with the like father, like son stuff. For example, HE CRIES IF YOU DON'T LET HIM WATCH FOOTBALL. Seriously. I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried.
Last night we took Luke with us to watch the NC State football game. Kick-off wasn't until 7:30 and Luke usually starts his bath/feeding/bed routine at 8:00, so we weren't sure how the evening was going to pan out.
At 8:00 he started getting fussy, so I changed his diaper and fed him. Yes, I am that lady that will breastfeed her kid whenever, wherever. Don't want to see a teeny bit of Mom-boob? DON'T LOOK. I thought he would follow his normal routine and fall asleep after his dinner. Not so much. I held him; he fussed. I put him in the Bjorn; he fussed. I gave him a pacifier; he fussed. Steven draped a blanket over his head to make it dark and cozy; he fussed.
At this point, I was running out of ideas. Out of exasperation I handed him to Steven. He held Luke so that he was sitting up and facing the football field. Luke stopped crying. He was looking at the field, and I swear he was actually watching the game. He took a 15 minute nap at halftime and then woke up, on his own, when the third quarter started.
At 10:00 he was hungry so I fed him. Again, I assumed he was tired and tried to hold him so he could sleep. Wrong again. He wasn't happy unless he was awake and facing the action.
I won't go as far as to say that Steven would cry if he couldn't watch football, but let's just say I pity whoever tries to come between him and the big screen if our team is playing.
P.S. - Did you know that Maury used to be a real journalist, and that he's married to 90's news anchor Connie Chung? I know. Weird.
Good To Know
If all of your nursing pads are in the laundry, a clean sock works just fine.
Looks a bit lumpy, but it works.
Looks a bit lumpy, but it works.
I Love A Good Deal
Friday morning I went to a children's consignment fair. Thanks to an early bird pass, I got first pick of all the gently used goodies. Because I can't help but brag about what I got, here's a breakdown of my score:
$40 - inSTEP bike trailer
$2 - Munchkin dishwasher basket
Just in case you're not convinced of my deal-finding prowess, the bike trailer alone would retail for around $120 and Baby Bjorns go for at least $60, so yeah I feel like I robbed the place.
$40 - inSTEP bike trailer
$35 - Baby Bjorn (looks brand new)
$16 - 22 various board books $5 - Graco Tot-Loc feeding chair
$4 - 2 name brand winter beanie hats
$4 - 10 pair of socks$2 - Munchkin dishwasher basket
Just in case you're not convinced of my deal-finding prowess, the bike trailer alone would retail for around $120 and Baby Bjorns go for at least $60, so yeah I feel like I robbed the place.
It's Cool, I've Got This
For the first time in my life I feel like I'm actually competent at something. I admit I have talents and skills, but there is always a teensy bit of doubt lurking around them.
It doesn't matter what I'm doing, I usually have a way of second guessing myself.
In design school I always felt like I was average or bad compared to my peers, and some days I thought I wouldn't make it out alive. I graduated but towards the end my goal was survival rather than excellence.
As a wife, I think I'm doing pretty well with the relationship stuff but not so hot on the housekeeping front. I can never stay ahead of the dishes or the clutter and that's only going to get worse as our family grows.
Surprising to me, I actually feel that being a mom comes naturally. I think I have found the comfortable middle ground between the hovering, panicked mom and the too-busy-with-her-own-shit-to-care-about-the-baby mom. I adore my son and would do anything for him, but I don't feel like I've had to throw my identity or marriage down the drain to be a good parent. I have done my fair share of emergency googling, but I try to take the advice with a grain of salt and just do what Steven and I feel is best, for us, in that moment.
HOWEVER. I realize that Luke is just a baby and I haven't had to actually parent him yet. There is no disciplining, no setting of limits, no this is for your own good moments yet. Unless you count the q-tip episode - that was for his own good but he HATED it while it was happening. In fact, I am sure all you experienced moms are rolling your eyes at my naivete. My confidence will probably come crashing downwhen he refuses to potty train when he throws his first tantrum when he starts teething any day now, but for now it feels good to feel good about things.
It doesn't matter what I'm doing, I usually have a way of second guessing myself.
In design school I always felt like I was average or bad compared to my peers, and some days I thought I wouldn't make it out alive. I graduated but towards the end my goal was survival rather than excellence.
As a wife, I think I'm doing pretty well with the relationship stuff but not so hot on the housekeeping front. I can never stay ahead of the dishes or the clutter and that's only going to get worse as our family grows.
Surprising to me, I actually feel that being a mom comes naturally. I think I have found the comfortable middle ground between the hovering, panicked mom and the too-busy-with-her-own-shit-to-care-about-the-baby mom. I adore my son and would do anything for him, but I don't feel like I've had to throw my identity or marriage down the drain to be a good parent. I have done my fair share of emergency googling, but I try to take the advice with a grain of salt and just do what Steven and I feel is best, for us, in that moment.
HOWEVER. I realize that Luke is just a baby and I haven't had to actually parent him yet. There is no disciplining, no setting of limits, no this is for your own good moments yet. Unless you count the q-tip episode - that was for his own good but he HATED it while it was happening. In fact, I am sure all you experienced moms are rolling your eyes at my naivete. My confidence will probably come crashing down
I've Got Junk In My Trunk
... and I'm not just talking about my giant stroller or that case of canned soda that hasn't made its way into the house.
Now, in order to find the humor to my story you must understand that I am NOT racist. I strive to be "color blind" in all aspects of my life. I have several black friends. Yes, I realize that's what White People say when they're about to say something terribly insensitive. How do I even know my friends are black if I'm so color blind? Shut up. That's how.
Anyway...
I have never been the hot girl. In the theater of life I am the sarcastic sidekick to the perky blonde. I am the Janeane Garofolo to your Uma Thurman. Please tell me you get that reference and that I'm not the only person that thinks The Truth About Cats & Dogs was under rated.
I have never been the girl with the slender hips, non-existant thighs and the tight jeans. Well, at least not intentionally tight. Give me a break, I just had a baby. And by "had a baby" I mean "ate a pint of ice cream."
I have an hourglass figure with too much time on the bottom. When I haul ass I have to take two trips. I have a big butt, a broad pelvis and wide hips. However you want to say it, I'm pear shaped. Always have been, always will be.
As a result of being bottom-heavy, I don't often get hit on or cat-called. However, on the rare occasion that I do find myself the subject of a stranger's flattery said stranger is often of a different culture than myself. A culture that enjoys a voluptuous woman.
Several years ago, a man on the sidewalk said "Damn girl, you're built like a sister!" Of course, when I told this story to my friend, she said "Um, it's pronounced sist-AH not sist-ER.* Unless he thought you looked like a nun." Since I had left my wimple at home, I am going to assume he was talking about my figure. This was not the first time that someone has hit on me by complementing me on my hips or butt.
*See, I told you I have black friends.
It used to upset me to get a compliment like that. As well intentioned as a man may have been, all I heard was "You're fat. I like that about you." I don't care how much you enjoy my big butt. I still don't want to have a big butt.
Today someone complimented me on the street - he liked the way I was "shakin' it" - and it made my day. I thought, there's a man that appreciates a woman's shape. I don't know what changed in my mind, but at that moment I saw my body for what it was.
I don't have big hips because the universe wants me to hate shopping for pants. I have big hips so that I can easily bring children into this world, and that makes them beautiful. Yes, part of me will always cringe when it's time to try on bathing suits, but now I have a new respect for a part of my body that I have always hated.
So thank you, random sidewalk man, for helping me see what you see.
Now, in order to find the humor to my story you must understand that I am NOT racist. I strive to be "color blind" in all aspects of my life. I have several black friends. Yes, I realize that's what White People say when they're about to say something terribly insensitive. How do I even know my friends are black if I'm so color blind? Shut up. That's how.
Anyway...
I have never been the hot girl. In the theater of life I am the sarcastic sidekick to the perky blonde. I am the Janeane Garofolo to your Uma Thurman. Please tell me you get that reference and that I'm not the only person that thinks The Truth About Cats & Dogs was under rated.
I have never been the girl with the slender hips, non-existant thighs and the tight jeans. Well, at least not intentionally tight. Give me a break, I just had a baby. And by "had a baby" I mean "ate a pint of ice cream."
I have an hourglass figure with too much time on the bottom. When I haul ass I have to take two trips. I have a big butt, a broad pelvis and wide hips. However you want to say it, I'm pear shaped. Always have been, always will be.
As a result of being bottom-heavy, I don't often get hit on or cat-called. However, on the rare occasion that I do find myself the subject of a stranger's flattery said stranger is often of a different culture than myself. A culture that enjoys a voluptuous woman.
Several years ago, a man on the sidewalk said "Damn girl, you're built like a sister!" Of course, when I told this story to my friend, she said "Um, it's pronounced sist-AH not sist-ER.* Unless he thought you looked like a nun." Since I had left my wimple at home, I am going to assume he was talking about my figure. This was not the first time that someone has hit on me by complementing me on my hips or butt.
*See, I told you I have black friends.
It used to upset me to get a compliment like that. As well intentioned as a man may have been, all I heard was "You're fat. I like that about you." I don't care how much you enjoy my big butt. I still don't want to have a big butt.
Today someone complimented me on the street - he liked the way I was "shakin' it" - and it made my day. I thought, there's a man that appreciates a woman's shape. I don't know what changed in my mind, but at that moment I saw my body for what it was.
I don't have big hips because the universe wants me to hate shopping for pants. I have big hips so that I can easily bring children into this world, and that makes them beautiful. Yes, part of me will always cringe when it's time to try on bathing suits, but now I have a new respect for a part of my body that I have always hated.
So thank you, random sidewalk man, for helping me see what you see.
Busy Weekend
As of yesterday my baby boy is 3 months old. Time is flying by!
We spent the weekend visiting friends and family in my hometown. We ate good food and watched lots of football. Luke got to meet my step-mom and step-sister and spent lots of quality time with my Dad. We were hosted by my Bestie Rachel and her family - Luke has no shortage of people that love him! He also went to church for the first time and was very well behaved. Here's my favorite pic of the weekend.
In other busy news, I'm an aunt! My step-sister Chelsea had her little girl, Emma Faye, yesterday evening. This little cutie weighed in at 7 pounds, 7 ounces and 20 inches long. Chelsea and Emma are recovering well and will get to go home on Wednesday. I'm terrible at remembering birthdays, anniversaries, or other dates but since she and Luke are exactly 3 months apart, I think I can remember this one!
We spent the weekend visiting friends and family in my hometown. We ate good food and watched lots of football. Luke got to meet my step-mom and step-sister and spent lots of quality time with my Dad. We were hosted by my Bestie Rachel and her family - Luke has no shortage of people that love him! He also went to church for the first time and was very well behaved. Here's my favorite pic of the weekend.
Luke and my Dad
In other busy news, I'm an aunt! My step-sister Chelsea had her little girl, Emma Faye, yesterday evening. This little cutie weighed in at 7 pounds, 7 ounces and 20 inches long. Chelsea and Emma are recovering well and will get to go home on Wednesday. I'm terrible at remembering birthdays, anniversaries, or other dates but since she and Luke are exactly 3 months apart, I think I can remember this one!
Oh, I am one proud Mama and Auntie!
Sniffle, Snort, Cough
I'm sorry posting has been so light this week. All three of us have had colds and we are finally getting back to normal. My cold was the worst of the three because I stupidly decided to go to a step class before I was fully recovered, so I had a relapse. Ugh.
On a related note, you know you're a mom when you've picked someone else's nose with a q-tip.
On a related note, you know you're a mom when you've picked someone else's nose with a q-tip.
12 Week Update
Ok, Luke will be 12 weeks old tomorrow and I have to brag about him a little bit.
He has been consistently sleeping through the night for almost 2 weeks! *internet high 5* Every night Daddy gives him a bath and puts him in his pajamas while I clean up the dinner dishes. Some nights, if Luke is agreeable, we turn on the ipod and have a family dance party - so far his favorites are 'Yellow Submarine' and 'Hey Ya.' Then I give him a nice, long feeding on the couch while Daddy and I watch some TV and then Daddy puts him to bed. He's been going to bed around 8:30 and he wakes up between 5:30 and 6:30.
We also stopped swaddling him about a week ago. To my surprise, he didn't fight it AT ALL. He just lays in his crib with a blanket over him. He usually kicks it off in the night, but it doesn't wake him up.
He is starting to gain control over his torso/stomach muscles. Last night in his baby bath tub we saw him lift his back away from the tub and sit up just a little bit. But hey, progress is progress.
He has expanded his range of vocal noises. He used to just say "ooh" but now he will grunt, squeak and giggle. He is most talkative on his changing table and he has started responding to tickling and funny faces. We almost got a laugh out of him yesterday, and I think that's just around the corner.
Lastly, I just have to share this little gem. I took the video with my iPhone and edited it with an app called Splice. If you have an iPhone I recommend this app. It's only $0.99 and it allows me to edit video, add music and lots of other features I haven't figured out yet. Will it make you a Spielberg or Scorsese? No, but for less than a buck it will add some pizazz to that clip of your kid doing something cute. Speaking of cute...
He has been consistently sleeping through the night for almost 2 weeks! *internet high 5* Every night Daddy gives him a bath and puts him in his pajamas while I clean up the dinner dishes. Some nights, if Luke is agreeable, we turn on the ipod and have a family dance party - so far his favorites are 'Yellow Submarine' and 'Hey Ya.' Then I give him a nice, long feeding on the couch while Daddy and I watch some TV and then Daddy puts him to bed. He's been going to bed around 8:30 and he wakes up between 5:30 and 6:30.
We also stopped swaddling him about a week ago. To my surprise, he didn't fight it AT ALL. He just lays in his crib with a blanket over him. He usually kicks it off in the night, but it doesn't wake him up.
He is starting to gain control over his torso/stomach muscles. Last night in his baby bath tub we saw him lift his back away from the tub and sit up just a little bit. But hey, progress is progress.
He has expanded his range of vocal noises. He used to just say "ooh" but now he will grunt, squeak and giggle. He is most talkative on his changing table and he has started responding to tickling and funny faces. We almost got a laugh out of him yesterday, and I think that's just around the corner.
Lastly, I just have to share this little gem. I took the video with my iPhone and edited it with an app called Splice. If you have an iPhone I recommend this app. It's only $0.99 and it allows me to edit video, add music and lots of other features I haven't figured out yet. Will it make you a Spielberg or Scorsese? No, but for less than a buck it will add some pizazz to that clip of your kid doing something cute. Speaking of cute...
He has gotten SO BIG! He's not even 3 months old yet, but he's been wearing 3-6 month clothes for several weeks now. He's pushing 14 pounds and, as of his last weigh-in, he's in the 81st percentile for length and 85th percentile for weight. Not only is he a big baby, but every time he gets measured he has moved up on the percentile scale. At this rate he'll be Shaq-sized by high school.
Babies Should Come With Cup Holders
Seriously. Do you know how hard it is to carry a carseat, open a door and hold a cup of hot chocolate? In the rain? It's impossible.
Apparently I should have sprung for the options package when I ordered Luke.
Apparently I should have sprung for the options package when I ordered Luke.
Life as a Working Mom
I have been back at work for two weeks. I didn't want to go back at all so soon, but to be honest, it's not as bad as I expected.
A big part of me being OK with this is our child care situation. We live 2 minutes from Steven's Grandma and she watches Luke when we're at work. In fact, that is why we live where we live. We couldn't afford the cost of traditional child care and we couldn't afford the time of driving to her house every morning if we lived further away. She watches another little boy - he just turned 1 - so Luke will learn some social skills while sparing me the stresses of a bigger, less personal day care facility. Also, since she's family I can trust that she has Luke's best interests in mind.
The other factor in my happiness is my work schedule. From now through the end of 2010 I am only at the office 24 hours a week. I leave 2 hours early 4 days a week and I have Wednesdays off. It is so nice to be able to have one-on-one time with Luke and be able to catch up on chores like laundry and household errands. If I get those out of the way on my "Mom day" I have my weekends free to enjoy time as a family. The biggest reason I cut back my work schedule is breast feeding. The more I'm home the less I have to pump and the more I can nurse him - it's true, draught is always better than bottled.
Right after Luke was born I was quite emotional about leaving him with someone else. I'm not going to lie - I was a wreck. But once the hormones ebbed and I considered how our lifestyle would change without my income I slowly started to come around. Now, don't think I'm leaving my son with someone else so I can buy designer jeans and get $300 haircuts. Not even. With two incomes we are able to live comfortably and even save some for the future, but we're not living so lavishly that we could easily cut out luxuries and make it on Steven's income alone. So if I want to eat something other than Ramen or take a vacation, EVER, work I must.
To my surprise, my first day wasn't bad at all. Steven drops Luke off in the mornings, so I didn't have some embarassing scene in Grandma's driveway. I just gave them both a kiss good-bye at our front door then I jumped in the shower. Then at work I didn't once get weepy or call Grandma "just to check in." She has my number - if there's an emergency she will call me. Yes, I miss him, but I don't tear up looking at his picture and I don't spend all day watching Grandma's web-cam. I am attempting to be reasonable here and I think I'm doing quite well on that front.
If money were no object I would absolutely quit my job and stay home, but that's not the world I live in. Luckily for me, I found a silver lining - I love walking through Grandma's door and seeing Luke recognize me and give me a big, toothless smile. If you never leave, you never get a homecoming, right?
A big part of me being OK with this is our child care situation. We live 2 minutes from Steven's Grandma and she watches Luke when we're at work. In fact, that is why we live where we live. We couldn't afford the cost of traditional child care and we couldn't afford the time of driving to her house every morning if we lived further away. She watches another little boy - he just turned 1 - so Luke will learn some social skills while sparing me the stresses of a bigger, less personal day care facility. Also, since she's family I can trust that she has Luke's best interests in mind.
The other factor in my happiness is my work schedule. From now through the end of 2010 I am only at the office 24 hours a week. I leave 2 hours early 4 days a week and I have Wednesdays off. It is so nice to be able to have one-on-one time with Luke and be able to catch up on chores like laundry and household errands. If I get those out of the way on my "Mom day" I have my weekends free to enjoy time as a family. The biggest reason I cut back my work schedule is breast feeding. The more I'm home the less I have to pump and the more I can nurse him - it's true, draught is always better than bottled.
Right after Luke was born I was quite emotional about leaving him with someone else. I'm not going to lie - I was a wreck. But once the hormones ebbed and I considered how our lifestyle would change without my income I slowly started to come around. Now, don't think I'm leaving my son with someone else so I can buy designer jeans and get $300 haircuts. Not even. With two incomes we are able to live comfortably and even save some for the future, but we're not living so lavishly that we could easily cut out luxuries and make it on Steven's income alone. So if I want to eat something other than Ramen or take a vacation, EVER, work I must.
To my surprise, my first day wasn't bad at all. Steven drops Luke off in the mornings, so I didn't have some embarassing scene in Grandma's driveway. I just gave them both a kiss good-bye at our front door then I jumped in the shower. Then at work I didn't once get weepy or call Grandma "just to check in." She has my number - if there's an emergency she will call me. Yes, I miss him, but I don't tear up looking at his picture and I don't spend all day watching Grandma's web-cam. I am attempting to be reasonable here and I think I'm doing quite well on that front.
If money were no object I would absolutely quit my job and stay home, but that's not the world I live in. Luckily for me, I found a silver lining - I love walking through Grandma's door and seeing Luke recognize me and give me a big, toothless smile. If you never leave, you never get a homecoming, right?
I Save, You Save
Attention Moms and Moms-to-Be: If you haven't been to Diapers.com yet, you should go. Now!
I have been shopping with them for a few months and I am in love. They carry all the brands I need - diapers, strollers, clothes, and more - and offer loads of ways to save on your order. One of the savings programs is the refer-a-friend deal. If you create a free account with them you save 15% on your first order, and I get a $10 credit for referring you. It's win-win, right?
I added the handy button to my sidebar to get you started. Happy saving!
Please note: I did not get paid or perk'ed for mentioning this program. I joined on my own and wanted to share the love with you guys!
I have been shopping with them for a few months and I am in love. They carry all the brands I need - diapers, strollers, clothes, and more - and offer loads of ways to save on your order. One of the savings programs is the refer-a-friend deal. If you create a free account with them you save 15% on your first order, and I get a $10 credit for referring you. It's win-win, right?
I added the handy button to my sidebar to get you started. Happy saving!
Please note: I did not get paid or perk'ed for mentioning this program. I joined on my own and wanted to share the love with you guys!
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